What's Keeping You?by Tammy Shaklee, Relationship Expert and H4M FounderJun 27, 2013
Having been a matchmaker nearly 24 years, I have talked with thousands of people who say they want a relationship. To take the plunge and allow us to actually help them, they must first make a commitment to us as their matchmaker. This is the first problem with relationships. Relationships require a commitment. It seems the longer you go without making a commitment to love someone completely, the harder it is to make a commitment about anything dealing with matters of the heart – a drink, a date, a dinner, a vacation or a lifetime.
I have read men use the right side of their brain, the more logical side (compared to women who tend to use the left, more emotional part). When you add logic with commitment, it gets too big, too scary, and too uncertain.
Love tends to be 99.99% emotional. We do not know why we love who we love. There may be no specific answer to why we are attracted to whom we are attracted. It is emotion – organic, vulnerable, scary emotion. When that love is returned – the vulnerable, committed, deep love – it is magical. When it is withheld or denied or lost, it is wrenching.
So why risk the pain of rejection, denial and pain by committing to loving someone? Because the return on your emotional “investment” outweighs any reward a financial institute can come near.
Anything worth having requires a commitment of time, money and effort. Logically, we seem to understand that in education, career, fitness, health, where and how we live, even what we drive. But when it comes to matters of the heart, some believe they should look across a crowded room, lock eyes, know he’s the one, and birds sing. Where is the logic now?
Love simply cannot be attained with intellect, logic or the material world. Love requires a commitment from your heart, and from your soul. And the longer you have fought commitment, the larger the investment demanded to work through the fear and doubt. It’s a commitment to find the only thing that matters at the end of your life.
Who did you love?
And who loved you?
You, no matter who you are now in reading this, deserve love. Real, unconditional love.
As we simply say every day, “There is someone for everyone. Let us introduce you.”