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The App—Breaking Up is Hard to Do

Guy on his phone at a coffee shop

Last spring, a handsome, fit, accomplished, slightly older, but most eligible bachelor walked into our offices for his complimentary consultation.  Before our two-hour private interview, he let me know that he had spent the entire morning “closing all of [his] accounts” for online dating attempts.

Surprised, I asked, “How many accounts WAS that? And how much time and money was that costing you each month?”

That morning, my client broke up with the gay man app. He turned away from the online experience, the sites, the laptop and smartphone full of noise.  He kissed goodbye to the algorithms.

A month later, after this particular man had become an H4M Client, I participated in the International Matchmaking Conference in New York, where I met Dan Slater, author of “Love in the Time of Algorithms – What Technology Does to Meeting and Mating.”  While I had never logged on to a dating site or app, I’ve always known it was important for me to understand the gay men that do.

If it works for you, and if you’re finding and meeting the caliber of men you deserve -- men who are true to what and whom they say they are online -- then I might recommend you keep online dating as one of your multifaceted approaches to finding the perfect man for you.

But, if you’re like some of our clients, you’ve spent years online, and thousands of dollars, with no results.  So, if you’re still sitting at home, single, and reading this -- then why not break up with the old ways, and try something new? Try something real and tangible.  Something based on a human filter, a team of professionals, and those compassionate souls that want you to find true love as much as you do.

This week, the above referenced client has a second date planned with a quality and loving man we’ve introduced him to through H4M.  It’s been months of quality introductions, and we’re excited that this one is the best connection and has real potential. We’ve not only got their second date planned, but they’ve already made plans beyond the second date – and are excited to spend time together Sunday night watching the Oscars.  If only Ellen DeGeneres knew, we know she’d blow them a kiss right into the camera!

While each of us has probably been guilty of waiting to break up with someone until we found someone better come along, I propose a spring challenge. Take the leap of faith and break up with the app!  Try something NEW.  Start this season truly believing that there is another way for you to find true love.  Breaking up -- I know it’s hard.  This is why I’ve called on some reinforcements.  Come on Neil; bring it on home for us:

For more information on traditional introductions, courting, and dating for today’s modern gay single, contact H4M—the offline, personal matchmaking service designed exclusively for those seeking a long-term relationship. You can also like our Facebook page for daily inspiration on finding love. #loveislove

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The best opportunities come from the people you’ve taken the time to get to know.
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